Brotherhood
by emjoelle
Summary: While recovering from an injury Optimus reflects on the decisions he made during and before the war that led him to where he is. Ratchet listens and reflects too. The two discover real brother bonds are not formed by cohorts and C.N.A. but by shared experiences. will likely be a two-shot)
1. Chapter 1

**Brotherhood**

**Chapter 1 The Prime  
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**A/N: memories are in italics. **

**Vorn=83 years Breem=8.3 Minutes Click=Minute Nanoclick=second Orbital Cycle=one month**

**Disclaimer: Transformers and Lyrics do not belong to me. **

_"No one could ever know me, no one could ever see me  
>Since you're the only one who knows what it's like to be me<br>Someone to face the day with, make it through all the rest with  
>Someone I'll always laugh with<br>Even at my worst, I'm best with you, yeah_

_ It's like you're always stuck in second gear  
>When it hasn't been your day, your week<br>Your month, or even your year I'll be there for you  
>(When the rain starts to pour)<br>I'll be there for you  
>(Like I've been there before)<br>I'll be there for you  
>('Cause you're there for me too<em>_**)"**_** "I'll be There for You"**- Rembrandts

It had been an extremely long day and Optimus Prime was exhausted both mentally and physically. The Decepticons were relentless in the attacks today no more hit and retreat. Fortunately all that came out of it was a few minor wounds, but the worst of them coming to him. His right arm would be sore a while. He was on duty watching for any more activity while the others recharged. The humans left long ago. It was quiet now and with the pain gone he allowed his thoughts to wander.

He thought of Elita, his bond mate, whom he missed so much. He thought about the first time he saw her vorns before the war began. _"…and then that was when I blasted him right in the shoulder. You should have seen his optics. Brother? Cybertron to Orion. Is anyone home?" _

_His brother was saying something but Orion quit listening. He had been more interested in the data pad in his hand until someone caught Orion's optic and he was further distracted. Not that it was hard to do. Megatronus was always talking about his skill in the arena and how he was going to use it to make everything fair one day Orion didn't like politics. He didn't like injustice but he was just one mech. He'd let the bigger wiser mechs handle that. He was young and a beautiful femme just noticed him. _

_"__I hear you Megatronus. You are amazing. More so than I'll ever be at fighting that is for sure. If physical strength was all a leader needed you would be Prime in a spark beat, however, It is silly to think that fighting is the only way to get a better cybertron. A good leader values all life and isn't just out to take it. He will see that every cybertronian has value and can contribute something great given the chance. He can't choose his cohort, and shouldn't be limited by their status. You could…" He looked up to see where Megatronus was looking at as he quit paying attention to Orion. That was when he noticed her noticing him. _

_"__Hi, Orion, right? My designation is Elita" she said as she sat down. _

_"__Yes" he confirmed. "May I help you? Can I get you a drink or an oil cake, Elita?"_

_"__I'll have an oil cake and some energon" she said but you don't have to buy it for me. I have my own credits you know." She told him with a smile. "You're the one I often see around the archives, correct? I've been at the docks but I am going to start on over there soon. I was hoping to know some people before I started."_

_"__Well it is mostly me lately. This is my brother, Megatronus, he is there some but he is most often fighting. He is the reigning gladiator champion, so quiet down time is rare for him. Hey Megatronus…" Orion looked up to see his optics glow with a jealousy, and a hint of anger as he left. _

_"__Well I guess we will be getting to know each other really well. I am looking forward to it, Orion. I like your ideas. Do you think we will ever see that? Do you really think change is possible?"_

_"__Anything is possible. I doubt it will come about in our life time. I don't know of anyone who is strong charismatic and has a pure enough spark to initiate the change, at least no one who the counsel would recognize as such. My brother is the closest that I could think of but sometimes he can be a bit selfish. I am afraid power might go to his processor. I'd help him if I thought it would do any good."_

_"__I see that in you, Orion. Give yourself some credit. I would get behind you and any way I could." She smiled sweetly at him. "if it meant fighting."_

_"__It won't. But thank you. I'll be looking for you in the next cycles." He slid credits on the table for her refreshments and watched her leave. _

That was a good day and it seemed like only nanoclicks ago. Then the war started.

_"__Elita, sweet spark, you must get off world as quickly as you can. Take Chromia and Moon Racer with you. The decepticons won't take prisoners, especially you. Megatron will kill you personally to get to me. He is a coward."_

_"__He won't! Optimus, I want to join the cause Please…Prime"_

_"__No, Elita, Please take the shuttle now. I will be in touch. Keep the Autobot frequencies open as well as mine. I love you. We will be together again. I promise. I can't bear the thought of you hurt."_

_He and a small group of autobots left as she and her sisters took off in another direction. He saw and heard explosions. He couldn't make out anything, not even debris. He called but heard only static. He prayed to Primus they made it and only had damaged radios but he feared the worst.. "He won't"_ she had said. He could have done any number of things. Did she know something he didn't? His spark still ached.

He hoped she survived and got off world and when the war was finally over they would reunite. Other bots were coming in regularly and like he told her anything is possible. He cycled his vents and rubbed his arm absently.

He thought of his brother, Megatron. He was of course the reason for all this pain and death. Megatron's pride and jealousy made his spark cold. Optimus knew full well that Megatron fully intended to kill him but still held on to hope that he would see the truth and turn back. Optimus would welcome him back. He was beginning to see that like, Ratchet and the others said, it wasn't going to happen and he would have to do whatever was necessary to end the war, and ending the war meant killing his own brother. It was set in his C.N.A. Optimus should have recognized it as sparklings but at the time there was so much 'hero worship' of his older brother he didn't think Megatronus had the ability to do wrong. Little did he realize he indeed had the perfect namesake. He would throw anyone to the sharkticons even then. He looked back now and could only shake his helm.

_"__Sire! That is so unfair. Orion gets to go off world with you. He never gets called out for missing his required assignments. Spoiled little mech has always been your favorite. You and carrier's perfect sparkling" Megatronus screamed with his optics glowing an odd shade of yellow orange._

_"__Megatronus! No bot ever said anything about fair. You have what you have and you deal with it. You worry about yourself and not your brother. I have to watch him more closely and also I expect you do be the example. Your carrier I and do correct him when he needs it. You are the eldest and supposedly the most responsible mech. Act like it! I am starting to question it. He is not making this trip, neither one of you are. See to your brother and carrier while I am away. You know I care about you too quit being ungrateful."_

_He turned his face hard and holding back sobs almost ran over Orion who was sitting on the floor looking up at him arms raised innocently oblivious to what just took place._

_"__Megsy"_

_"__What? How many times do I have to keep telling you, don't ever call me that!"_

_Orion looked down disappointment showing on his faceplates._

_"__I am sorry, Orion. It isn't really your fault our creators are so unfair. How can they not like that expression. You are so very manipulative. You have a way with words too, little brother. What do you want?" He looked away and whispered "You always get what you want anyway."_

_"__I want to fly. Take me up Megs…Megatronus. Please?!_

_He hesitated. "You know the creators hate when I do that, right? If we get in trouble one of us will be able to manipulate our way out of it I am sure. Let's go for it!"_

_They had been in flight for about a breem when their carrier returned and spotted them._

_"__Megatronus, Orion! Come down now. What in the name of Primus do you think you are doing? What if you lost control, Megatronus, you could be damaged and Orion permanently offlined. I won't hear any excuses from either of you. Unacceptable" She walked off and whispered, "My mechs are going to be the death of me."_

_"__I am sorry Megsy. Thanks for not throwing blame on me."_

_"__Orion, it wouldn't have done any good. Sometimes you have to know when to quit." He laughed. "It was still your idea. I could have…nevermind don't call me that! Just…Go away"_

He saw signs now and didn't even want to imagine what Megatron could have been thinking at that point. Sibling rivalry at its worst.

He thought about Cliff Jumper, Jazz, and all the others who died under his command. Sure, he told himself, they knew what they were signing up for and they were devoted to His cause, no that didn't sound right, the Autobot cause, no that didn't quite work either. Freedom, that was the cause they were fighting for. It was freedom for their home and for themselves and now unfortunately for a completely different species and a completely different home. Yeah they fought and they knew what they were getting in to when they enlisted. It didn't change anything. Cliff Jumper and all the others, Cliff came to mind because he was the most recent, had died under his command. He was responsible for life and death decisions at the spur of a moment and they were responsible to obey.

_At the beginning of the war he made a decisive effort to personally meet with every bot that enlisted in the cause. He wanted to see their face and put the name to it. They were all risking their life for something, he, they believed in. As time went on and the war went beyond Cybertron meeting each one of them became impossible_

_"__Good afternoon, sir, my designation is Cliff Jumper. I am honored to serve you and the Autobots. I look forward to kicking some 'con tailpipe"_

_"__Glad to have you. But you are young. Please understand that war is no game, it is not pretty or romantic. It is grief, pain, and…"_

_"__it is for freedom and for Cybertron". He cut in "I understand and I am willing to fight. Die if it comes to that but I plan on keeping myself alive, sir."_

_"__That is the goal young soldier."_

_"__I will do whatever I am asked, regardless, into the center of Dark Mount, whateveer."_

_"__Come with me soldier" a large blue general told him. He radioed Optimus. "I don't think this one will ever shut up. He will blow his cover if he is ever undercover, sir."_

_"__Acknowledged"_

He became a valuable asset to Prime and even more so on Earth. When he went offline he struggled with it because of the numbers and the effect his death had on the rest of the small team.

It wasn't something he took lightly. He had to be strong. Everyone else was leaning on him and everything would crash under him if he showed doubt. He heard something behind him and he turned, clearly startled.

"Ratchet, what are you doing? It is still early. You don't have to take over yet. I still have a few hours."

"I have recharged all I am going to tonight apparently. I decided to come see how you were doing." He noticed Optimus was favoring his arm still. "You always attempt to cover yourself with that arm and it is starting to concern me, however it is a good thing you did this time or the damage would have been much worse"

He flexed it a bit. "I am fine now Ratchet, thanks." He said quietly and turned back to continue watch.

Ratchet didn't move. "Optimus, your arm is repaired and should even feel better but you are far from fine. Something is bothering you this morning."

"hummph' he chuckled. Optimus had been friends with Ratchet as long as he could remember and he never could figure out just how Ratchet was able to be so perceptive, to the point of coming out of recharge when something wasn't right with his patients, or friends, he thought. Ratchet was the only mech with the ball bearings to get in his leaders face and speak his mind. He was also the only mech that Prime would allow to do that. This might be one of those times if he weren't careful and he knew it. That was the last thing he wanted. Anyway, after all these vorns, Ratchet earned that right.

"I am tired old friend. This has dragged on so long. Megatron…"

"…Won't ever change and you know it. That's what this is. Am I right? You keep hoping that you won't have to… it won't come to…"

"…me killing my brother." He finally spoke it out loud. "You're right Ratchet. I hate the thought of it. But I am not blind to reality either. However, despite all this I am not sure I will be the one to do it. I am not sure that my spark will…" Optimus looked at the floor. "I am not sure I can old friend. Megatron must be stopped. He cannot take another life, and I am afraid that will only come about through his termination. I know in my spark it won't be at my hands." He looked at Ratchet who was staring at him with chevron raised. "I won't order anyone else to though. If it is him or one of the others, I…I'll do it in a spark beat.

"Optimus, if you need anything..."

"I know. I'll come see you, and yes I understand you mean with my sanity too. Understood."

Their EM fields brushed slightly as Ratchet left him for the remainder of watch He wasn't going to push it any further. He knew Prime well enough that he would do what was necessary. He also knew the spark wrenching pain it caused him. That was one of the reasons they were so close. They both understood the burden of making life and death decisions for others at a moment's notice, and the crushing burden when it was the life of someone you loved.

**A/N: It is strange sometimes how a story goes in a completely different direction that I initially planned. This was supposed to be a look at Optimus and Ratchet's friendship in Prime verse. It came about after a discussion with TheInkEngraver about tight friendships (bromances) in the transformers franchise. It turned into something very different. BTW: Breakdown/Knockout is the best followed by G1 Ratchet/Wheeljack, but TFP Ratchet/Optimus is great too. It is mainly Prime verse but with G1 elements. Not sure I did Cliff justice. **

**This was going to be a one shot but I think I may make it a two-shot. 2****nd**** chapter being Ratchet's take.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: The Medic**

**A/N: Memories/flashbacks are in italics**

**Disclaimer: Lyrics to A Friend Like You and Tubthumping are not mine. Transformers are not mine.**

_"__Through all of the laughter and tears  
>through all of the questions and fears<br>through all of the winning and losing and trying  
>I will be by your side, 'cuz you and I are friends for life" "<em>_**A Friend Like You**__"-__** Geoff Moore and the Distance**_

Ratchet turned to leave knowing he had given his CO and friend some comfort but had a hunch Optimus needed him to stay a little longer. It was almost as if they had a link that began early on. Like Primus himself arranged it. He cleared his intakes as he got to the door.

_The Medcenter was busy that day and the young medic had two more patients. He didn't recall seeing them before. He stepped out to call them back. The youngest was nervously pacing around the waiting area._

_"__Orion is afraid to fight me and now scared of the medic's! You are such a Coward! You're never going to hope to jump the system" _

_"__I am not. I just don't like bots that close to me. I like my personal space…exams, repairs, medicenters, ugh…" he rubbed his right arm. "It is preferable to talk your way out of trouble than fight. You'll get more of what you want that way. I wish you weren't so stubborn._

_"__Megatronus leave Orion alone. You only encourage him. You are going to damage your leg further and you already have done enough damage to Orion's arm. Just be still. These stunts you pull and then the resulting fights will end up in the termination of both of you. You are much stronger than him, Megatronus. Act like you have a functioning processor. Don't bring up politics in here." The femme answered._

_Ratchet shook his helm as he introduced himself and told them to follow him. There was something about these younglings that he knew would stick with him._

_"__Good evening Doc" the femme said. "My mechs here decided that they would fight, in mid air. Orion likes to surf on Megatronus when he is in alt form. He transformed, flipped and somehow hit Orion and then landed wrong. He has had difficulty walking."_

_"__You first, Megsy" Orion Pax whispered as he looked into the large medic's optics and sank back into the corner_

_"__Fine. Let's get it fixed and over with. It's bad when I walk but worse when I transform. I am ready to get back up and out." He sat impatiently on the exam berth and Ratchet quickly found the damaged connection and repaired it quickly. _

_"__Okay Orion, let's have a look at that arm." His soft green optics seemed to smile in spite of his exhaustion and frustration at both the young mechs. "It is hard to fix if I can't touch it, or even see it you know. Come on. You get your armor plate off and I'll show you something cool." He gave the curious mech a brief lesson on the pulleys in his arm and showed him how to weld tears armor._

_"__Thanks doc" Orion said with a little more confidence. _

_"__I'm not doc. Designation is Ratchet remember!" He told him more forcefully than he intended. "and you're welcome youngling." He went back to clean up. I just hope he stays out of trouble, but I doubt it. I'm not sure why but those two are going to be in the middle of something bigger than either of themselves. Why do I get the feeling I will be right there too? He asked himself_

Ratchet earned Optimus's trust that day. It would be one defining moment vorns later when the trust and friendship was truly cemented though. He saw him on and off before the war but then not again until they met following the battle at Tiger Pax when he went from being a field medic for the Autobots to Prime's CMO.

"_We need a medic here now. Someone help me with him." The blue femme said as she ran in with the scout. "Megatron was personally responsible. I am surprised he survived this long but I'm not sure he will make it"_

_"__Let me be the judge of that! Bring him here! What have we got?" the white and orange medic who was heading up the trauma unit just outside of Tiger Pax._

_"__Extreme loss of energon, severe damage to his helm and chassis, voice box is definitely damaged" the femme answered. "We found him after the battle ended. He had been captured and was just left there. Decepticons assumed he was dead I imagine."_

_"__NO!" Get me energon now!" He looked down at the scout struggling to stay conscious. "You will be ok. Rest now." He assured the yellow scout as he initiated stasis lock. _

_Surgery lasted the rest of the afternoon and through the evening to the early morning hours.. Ratchet was able to completely repair the extensive damage to his spark chamber and the rest of his chasis. His helm was a bit more difficult but was done without scaring. He was unable to make any repairs on his voice box. The scout wouldn't speak again but he was alive. He was frustrated and berating himself about it when Optimus came in. _

_"__Doctor, report." Came the voice of the commanding officer. Ratchet recognized it immediately._

_"__Optimus? He is stable and should recover, however he will never speak. I am sorry I was unable to repair his vocal processors. I tried. Megatron meant to kill him I think. He is one brave young scout. I only wish I could have done more."_

_"__Ratchet. I understand and so will he. We are grateful that you saved his life. That is the important thing. He is important to me and to my team. Arcee gave me the reoport. The fact that he lives gives much to your credit. You were one of the few I trusted. I would ask you to join my team as a permanent part as an officer. Consider being my CMO."_

_Ratchet hesitated "Optimus, I am honored, but I am not sure that I can.."_

_"__Think about it. I'll say it again. What you have done for Bumblebee today. What you have done for me. You are one of the very few I can trust."_

_"__Fine. I just hope my commission is short. This war needs to end, It needed to end a vorn ago." He grumbled._

"Ratchet," Optimus vented softly after some hesitation. "A word with you." It sounded like more of a command than a question although he didn't intend for it to come across that way.

He turned and faced his commanding officer. "What is it Optimus?" He knew it was more than the arm that was bothering him. Ratchet also knew that the conversation wasn't over. He wasn't sure how he knew these things but often passed it off as the simple fact he was a medic and trained to see hurt and fix it, but he seemed to recall being able to vorns before his training began. It seemed easier with Optimus.

"You would tell me if you thought something was off, if my leadership abilities were compromised, right?"

He wasn't sure what he was expecting Optimus to ask but that wasn't it. "Of course, Optimus, that is part of my job after all" he paused. "as your CMO, personal physician and most importantly as your friend. And to answer that, No your definitely aren't losing it. However, we have a few cycles before day break and one on one chats never hurt anyone. What is on your mind, besides the fact that your big brother is your mortal enemy?"

"I am beginning to question things, Ratchet. I can't do that. I can't afford to second guess myself and my decisions. I can't afford to have more questions than answers. I am the matrix bearer, the Prime. I am supposed to have the answers. Everyone else looks to me. If I am not okay then they are not okay. Then the battle comes. They die, Ratchet. They follow my orders. Orders that sent them to their death. When I back up I can't help but think this is yet one more of our fights. A fight in a rivalry that started as sparlklings and engulfed so many others" He started favoring his arm again. "I am lucky this time this was the worst of it. I guess physical reminders are a good thing."

"Quit worrying with your arm. Do you need something for pain?"

"It is just stiff"

Yeah. It will be for a little while, anyway..."

Optimus shook his helm and cleared his intakes.

"Optimus, you know there is more to it than you and Megatron. He was looking for an excuse to do this and would have anyway. The counsel didn't give you the matrix. If it was theirs to bestow it might have made sense to give it to him. He wanted it you were arguing his case. You got behind Megatronus. Do you really think it should be his? It passed to you because it was meant for you. You didn't just hand it over either. You could have. You know you were meant for this. You know that better than anyone else. Trust yourself, if you can't then trust the matrix within you."

"You are right about that old friend. However, death is...Ratchet, the matrix doesn't make those calls. I do. I keep fighting. We keep fighting. Our numbers here are falling. I keep hoping others will come. They are out there. Smokescreen heard, Wheeljack heard. I know others have and are on their way. But for what? Dying for Cybertron is one thing but not dying for an alien planet that is now our adopted one. I can't help but think asking that is wrong somehow."

"It is still for our home. Both of them are."

"Yes, but being responsible for the individuals too." He walked to the corner of the room. "Elita specifically. I was trying to save her. Maybe she would have had a better chance if I listened to her and let her decide. She might have actually survived. She may be alive but in my spark, I don't think so. I can't feel her anymore. Megatron has got to die too. No, Ratchet the matrix didn't make these calls."

Now it was Ratchet's turn to pace the floor. "You...you think I don't know about making that kind of decision? I don't have direct access to Primus or the wisdom of the ancients through a matrix. I have my training and my experience. That is all! I have too much experience with death and triage. I have spent way too much time trying to decide who I am going to try to repair. Then losing them and wondering if I made the wrong choice and could have saved the other. I have two deaths on my hands. Sometimes I ask myself was two necessary. It is part of the job and it is part of being in charge of a unit." He got really close to Optimus and leaned in." I second guess myself for about a nanoclick and I move on. I know many others are depending on me. It doesn't make it easy and it isn't fair but it is necessary. Optimus, I understand about Elita too. I'm going to tell you something that few others know. I am only telling you because being in charge you understand what it is like. It is also why I was hesitant to take be CMO when you asked at Tiger Pax."

_He was seeing patients in the medicenter in the middle of down town Crystal City. The war had been going on only a few orbital cycles. He was sure it would be over soon and he had not considered enlisting on either side. They both had made decisions he disagreed with. The main problem he had was how quickly both were willing to take another's life. He finished up one young Decepticon and was about to see a council member when he heard the sound of an explosion and felt the ground rock around him. Then his audios were filled with screams. He had no time to react before chaos broke out._

_ "__The building behind us collapsed in an explosion. Hundreds dead on impact, many more critically wounded. We need all the medical personnel we can get. Help!" Someone reported "They are on their way in". Ratchet hurried the young soldier off his berth and prepared himself for the rush._

_"__Ratchet!" someone screamed as the doors flew open a light blue femme and a bright red youngling about four vorns old were brought in covered in energon. Ratchet felt his energon run cold. He refused to believe his optics. It was Chromia and a youngling she had decided to take care of. _

_"__No! Primus not them. Help me now." Ratchet whispered and he begin to bark orders to the students and nurses around him. "I need Energon and Coolant here now. _

_"__Ratchet," Chromia whispered as her fans kicked into high and her vents backed up. "don't worry about me. Take care of the youngling…please I will always love you. See you in the Well"_

_"__No don't. Hang in there sweet spark. You'll be fine. So will little Blaze"_

_He looked at her and doubted he could save him but she had youth going for him and with the naked optic his wounds looked less severe as Chromia had thrown her body over him sheilding him from the worst of the flying debris. His medical protocols engaged shutting off all feelings and allowing him to focus on the youngling lying in front of him. He worked steadily for hours only pausing a moment when he noticed Chromia's signal go offline. Now he had to save him. He repaired all the visible damage and all his scanners showed him but before the solar cycle ended he had offlined. Ratchet finished up and assisted the others._

_"__I am leaving the city. The cons did this. I am joining this primus forsaken war. It ends now."he said as he left the clinic._

Optimus Prime looked at his CMO in disbelief. "Ratchet, that was, but, I never knew. I am so sorry old friend."

Ratchet nodded and said nothing. A few moments passed and the two war torn friends sat in each other's company. Finally Ratchet broke the silence. "Do you know what I think?" he finally asked in an attempt to lighten the mood." Now you're the one who is going to think I am losing it. But I can't help but think your creators knew something was unique about you two. I don't think it was a whim that he was designated Megatronus and that you Orion Pax. It is too close. Optimus Prime. I also don't think it was just chance that Alpha Trion was your mentor... Let's just say of any two modern cybertronians there is way more to the two of you than meets the eye."

"Primus! Ratchet, are you saying we are the ancients reincarnated?!"

"Maybe" He just laughed. "I just know destiny when I see it and I saw it the first time you came into the medicenter after playing Jet Judo with Megatron. I warned you that you would think I am crazy."

"Sometimes, crazy works." Optimus said fighting back a chuckle.

The sun was already up and every one was beginning to stir. They could hear loud music outside_.' I get knocked down but I get up again/nothings gonna keep me down/I get knocked down_...'Both mechs laughed. Humans and their music...

"Well I guess that is a sign. Thanks Ratchet for everything. I'm glad to know you get it."

"Just doing my job. Speaking of which shift is over. You're underfoot."

He left but not before welcoming the embrace of Primes EM field. Both of their sparks a bit lighter than before. The burden of responsibility for life and death was easier when each knew he didn't bear it alone. It isn't about cohorts or C.N.A that makes brothers. It is the shared experience that makes bonds. That is true brotherhood.

**A/N: I read somewhere that Thirteen, while not named in The Covenant of Primus, was actually Optimus Prime and that Orion Pax was him reincarnated. I liked the idea so I ran with it. (Even though it makes no sense that Alpha Trion wouldn't remember that. It makes no sense that he wouldn't remember his own brother's name anyway...) I know Megatron wouldn't be The Megatronus because he existed along with The Fallen (Megatronus) but I went with it anyway because I was going with the Orion is Thirteen thing. **

**Also Ratchet had an unnamed girlfriend in Animated. I'm saying it is Chromia. Not necessarily THE Chromia but it can be. It could be interesting seeing how she was close to Elita and I have seen Chromia and Ratchet together in other fics…**


End file.
